JUMP: Saying Goodbye to the Classroom and Hello to Diving into my Passion
This week marks the year anniversary of me saying goodbye to the college classroom and embarking on a new adventure, teaching yoga – with all the terrifying uncertainty of the unknown. I hung up my heels and green grading pen, exchanging them for yoga pants and books explaining Ayurveda. It was scary, exhilarating and felt like I had no idea what the hell I was doing. It also was the decision that led to the best year of my adult life.
I distinctly remember feeling that by leaving behind my pursuit of college professor greatness I was somehow letting my family and myself down. I’d worked so hard to earn my Masters and continued that drive as I applied for job after job – finally teaching at a for-profit university; realizing my goal of teaching World Religions. But reality fell far short of what my “dream job” was supposed to be. I found myself without support from the administration and finally dreading going in to teach. It broke my heart to realize that my Sunday evenings included anxious foreboding of the fight I’d have to put up during the week ahead.
“He made it seem so simple – if you hate what you’re doing, do something else.”
I realized that the time I spent in the studio, on my mat, was the time I looked forward to most in my week. During a casual conversation with my husband, he (in his ever supportive, ever loving way) commented to “just do it – just sign up for yoga teacher training”. He made it seem so simple – if you hate what you’re doing, do something else.
I went to the information open house and shocked the lead teachers when I introduced myself as “Kelsey – I want to be a yoga teacher.” I’d previously been involved in teaching other would-be yoga teachers’ yogic philosophy and I don't think the leaders thought their suggestions of my joining the ranks of RYT certified teachers were actually heard. But there I was, putting it all out there – asking the universe if this is what I should do.
As the opening night of the program loomed, I started to panic – was I really going to put my passion out there for others to be critical of? Didn't I already do that? What was I thinking!? I convinced myself, to combat the puke-inducing fear, that maybe I could just learn things to enhance and deepen my own practice if I didn't feel like I could share this joy-spring of my life with others. But that was never the case…the program filled me with a whole new level of appreciation of my own practice, a better understanding of myself as a person and a deep connection with some of the best women I’ve ever met.
It’s funny to look back now and see that it was just a year ago that I agonized over whether I was capable of sharing what has brought so much joy, peace and strength to my life. One of the best pieces of advice the leaders of the program gave me was that I didn’t have to give away my own practice to help someone build theirs. It was more than a light bulb moment for me – it was more like a firework moment. So here I am – sharing my love of yoga and building community in a whole new way.
Just to be clear – there has been an unbelievable orchestration by the universe to support this one decision I made to change my life path. Those amazing women I spoke of, for one, have been cheerleaders, tech support and brainstorm teammates that have all helped me to build the confidence to offer yoga my way. I was also introduced to this amazing podcast that I listen to anytime I feel like I can’t do this. Steph Crowder and her podcast, Courage and Clarity, offer support, troubleshooting and advice to anyone that is thinking about or in the midst of leaping from a traditional 9-5 to pursuing their passion. Her honesty and candor are some of the ways I pull myself out of the self-doubt pool and stand back on the self-confident deck.
I am so excited to share this milestone date with all of you and would love to hear what milestones you have coming up! Send them to me in the comments.
Steph Crowder's amazing content for Courage & Clarity is available where you find all great podcasts and also through her website courageandclarity.com. P.S. Two of my FAVORITE podcasts of hers are Episode 57: How to Stop Fighting Against your Life & Fall in Love With it Instead & Episode 39: 5 Steps to Design your Life Instead of Living by Default.